Untitled Poem - By Hannes Penttinen

This poem was written by my friend Hannes Penttinen; I felt it resonated with personal experiences, and therefore wanted to share it.

Where once I felt at home in your arms
 A poison fills my heart.
 And the longer I stay, the harder it is to leave, skin to skin, the more I bleed.
 The promise of a kiss that never comes,
 False warmth of a whiskey
  against the naked arctic cold.

I touch your hand as if
 There were many miles between us
 And your smile, inches from my face,
 clenches my jaw.
 Which you saw.

Screaming into a radio
 But it's on the wrong Channel.
 Screaming 'till my throat bleeds
 But the silence is still louder.

I don't care if it would kill me,
 Just want it to fulfill me.

It would be easier
 To pass the wait
 If I filled myself
 With hate.

But I can't do that.

I could write a book about the things you don't know.
 But if I did so,
 It would be better for you,
 were you never to have read it.
 And for all the things I could say,
 Better never to have said it.

If I could just lie,
 Maybe it wouldn't be goodbye.
 Maybe I could give it another try,
 But I doubt it.